Learning from the biggest year of my life so far.

21. That is what age i became this year and i feel like what i have learnt this year was at least 21x the amount i have learnt from the other 20 years of my life.

What did i learn from 2011?

1. It's OK to step out of your comfort zone and try new things and challenge yourself no matter what the outcome is and no matter what others say. Even if you took on something that others told you not too and it left you in the lowest or hardest part of your life which you have felt that does not mean it still wasn't a good decision so long as you have learnt from it and the experience. Sometimes we need to go backward in order to go forwards and sometimes we need to lose ourselves in order to find ourselves and who we truly are. But above all IT'S OK TO ASK FOR HELP WHEN YOU NEED IT!!!

2. Sometimes you may put your heart and soul into something and be disappointed with the result. Sometimes all the effort you put in is not noticed, and sometimes it hurts. They say people don't remember how fast you do a job as much as they remember how well you do it, but if no one comes to see how well you do it well then it is their loss. Personal recognition of achievements can go so far but we all need to hear a voice other than our own from time to time to let us know we are doing well or to give us feedback on whether we are on the right track.

3. When you make yourself busy to a point where you make sacrifices in your life, choose carefully what you sacrifice. I learnt those things which i sacrificed are actually the things i least wanted to and i hurt myself by sacrificing them, but now i know how much those things that i sacrificed mean to me, the old saying comes back 'you never know what you have until it is gone'. I will not sacrifice those things again.

4. Smile. The world needs it and you need it, but do not smile to cover up something that is screaming inside of you. When your face smiles but your eyes do not, that is when you need to talk to work to fix why your eyes are not smiling with you or why your heart does not feel the amount of joy which you show on your face. Find a quiet place to sit down and work out what is worrying you and better still talk to someone or simply treat yourself. Go for a walk, have a bath, go out for a coffee with a friend and relish in the simple joys of life.

That is some at least... and now the goals for 2012 include taking in what i have learnt from 2011 and apply them as the years go on. i'm writing them up now, some with much thought and some which are easy to put down. For now in terms of my training for the rest of the week...

Saturday - 15min run to Marlston Hill and 10x stair runs (approx 45 seconds each) walk down recovery and 10 sit-ups after each rep, and 15min run home

Sunday - Rest

Monday - Felt unwell and cut a run short; 4km run in 20 minutes followed by a pump class (increased warm-up and squats weights 1kg)

Tuesday - 45minutes on the bike; 10min warmup, 30 minutes of 40sec high rpm intervals on higher resistance and 50sec recovery on lower resistance. Followed by 5km run in 21 minutes on the tredmil and some arm weights and ab work for 10 minutes. Still felt unwell so hopefully i didn't over do it!

Wednesday - track session (with a head wind) followed by a body balance class

400m - 1.14min

300m x2 - 55.5sec, 54.8sec

200m x3 - 35.7sec, 35.7sec, 34.6sec

100m x5 - 16.5sec, 16.5sec, 16.2sec, 16sec, 16sec

Next session i want to do some slightly longer runs from 600m-300m to assess myself more!

Thursday - rest/40min walk

Friday - Gym session: 35min on bike with 25min of 40sec high resistance and 50sec lighter recovery then 3.5km run in 17 min on tredmil.

I know i need to do more running track sessions but i keep getting sore, sore knee, sore heels and my legs are tired. I need to work on quality not quantity but i am already doing less than i was last summer and i haven't rushed into the sessions. I think i just need more time to adjust, keep cross training and be careful, i'll get there. My track runs aren't very encouraging for myself atm but maybe i will go a little backwards before i go forwards as i adjust to track running again, after all it was only my 3rd session!! Patience and Perseverance. I will not give up.

Feeling Balanced :)

Had such a good active day today! I headed to the Runners club for my second track session, i was a little apprehensive about running in the wind today but my runs saw me have a tail wind which although would have made my times faster than my capabilities without wind made me feel like i was flying! So my session was:

300m - 53.6sec

250m - 43.9sec

2x200m - 33.3sec, 33sec

6x150m - 23.8sec, 24sec, 23.9sec, 24.5sec, 24.3sec, 23.5sec

Around this time last year i was running them a second faster around the 23 flat mark and was running 4.50min 1500m runs. Hopefully in about 4 weeks i can be down to these times again, that would be ideal. I have found my record of my training last summer and my times which i will see if i can post up here to use as a guide for now, i'm so glad i monitored it!

This evening i took myself to the gym and did half a pump class, i felt strong tonight! and then a body balance class which felt amazing! my flexibility has really increased over the past year event though i haven't been keeping up balance classes but i do stretch before and after every exercise session. I loved the tai chi part releasing all your energy into movements and the meditation at the end is wonderful to clear your mind and focus on your body. I'll say it again i love balance classes :)

I made a really good salad for lunch today i will be making again! It had spinach leaves, avocado, olives, carrot and tinned salmon which i have recently got into (full of omega 3's and taste good too!) and this was mixed with pepita's and a sprinkle of chilli dukkah Yum! I love flavours and the dukkah is a great simple way to add flavour whilst adding some good fats from the crushed nuts it contains.

One thing i have learnt today which makes total sense is that with exercise we should increase our intake of vitamin C and E. Especially with long sessions and aerobic exercise where we are needing high demands of oxygen, the increase in oxygen causes free radical damage to our cells which increases the soreness, stiffness and fatigue of our working muscles and body. Vitamin C and E are the antioxidants which fight these free radicals and are a great help when exercise demands increase the free radicals to a point where the bodies mechanism of rigging the free radicals is overloaded. Red and blue fruits such as berries are an excellent source of antioxidants and especially contain flavonoids. Tea is another great source of flavonoids (one big tick as i drink green tea whilst writing this... i love green tea!) along with betacarotene in vegetables. Vitamin C is also vital for a healthy and strong immune system! High levels of training and regular exercise can suppress immune function so increase your vitamin C to help prevent this, there is also support that yoga and tai chi can support immune function (another tick for today :)).

I had recently been to the doctors for a high level of fatigue to a point where it impeded on my exercise and even when i didn't exercise i was left needing naps in the afternoon which i don't usually do. Being a menstruating female and one who is highly active there are no surprises here where i have a low level of iron - 21 where 30-130 in normal. SO now i am taking 'Ferograd C' high dose iron supplements, they originally gave me stomach upsets but after persisting with them for a few weeks i am now discomfort free! I went away and missed taking them for a few days and was amazed at how quickly i felt so tired again! Exercise sure depletes already minimal stores very quickly. One thing i was surprised about was a low level of vitamin D i also had, once again below the lower threshold of acceptable. Vitamin D is important at maintaining calcium levels and maintaining bone strength. A lack of vitamin D can also increase muscle fatigue and reducing power. We mainly get vitamin D produced from our skin when exposed to UV sunlight or from the diet such as from fish (salmon and tuna especially) and eggs. Vitamin D deficiency is increasing in our current generations due to the effectiveness of sun care campaigns such as 'slip, slop, slap' and the fear of cancers. We should definitely be sun smart when out in the sun but we still need around 10-20 minutes of free sunlight a day depending on the season and time of day to make sure we get adequate production of vitamin D in our bodies which is a greater contributor to our vitamin D than our diet. University and studying indoors does not help with low vitamin D but by exercising more outside and getting more summer sun (in moderation) i have no doubt my levels of vitamin D will be up again soon, i will keep eating my salmon and tuna all the same for there multiple benefits!

Absent but not lost!

It has been a while, i do not know where the time went it!! So much happens in a few short months so i will start off where i left off.... city to surf :)

The day did not disappoint and there was a record 38,000 participants!! The atmosphere was electric and you could sense the happiness and enthusiasm of everyone around you. It was great to start in the A group up the front this year and not have to dodge prams and families but there were still enough people to pick out in front of you to catch up to and overtake to continuously set a challenge. I absolutely love the start when everyone is close together, thousands of runners around you running up St Georges Terrace then looking back on the top of the hill at Kings Park and seeing a sea of runners both in front and behind, so many people outside and running together for health, fitness and a great cause!! I felt like i kept up a good pace throughout the run, the toughest part was again at the 8-9km mark where you are getting exhausted, then at the 2km mark you get a boost of energy from excitement of the finish line coming, then the 1km mark is pick up the pace time! the best part is it is down hill and you feel like you are flying home! It is the best feeling!! I crossed the line in around 53 minutes on my watch and couldn't believe my official time when i found out... 53.35minutes!! the exact same time as i did last year down to the last second! i had to laugh i couldn't have done that if i tried! my average pace was 4.27 minutes for a kilometer so although i didn't exactly improve my time i didn't go any slower either, but i certainly will be aiming for the sub 50 minutes mark again next year! and i will have a better idea of the sort of training to do also... more long hill runs are needed :P but i was so happy with my results overall:

570th out of 14,342 12km runners, 33rd out of 6,521 female 12km runners and 11th out of 2,589 females in the 19-29 age group! I will make the top 10 next year :)

The winners were:

1st Lauren Shelley 00:44:22

2nd Emma Kraft 00:46:14
3rd Scarlett Duncan 00:47:06

So what followed after the city to surf? I enjoyed morning runs with friends from Trinity and kept up most of my endurance fitness with longer runs. The odd occasion on the tredmil i would run 10km in around 43 minutes which felt quite cruisey, i am itching to do a 5km fun run or something of a time trial i think i would be the fittest i have been for the 5km! I missed the Bunbury surf to surf fun run in October but maybe i can do the Australia day fun run in January if i can have time away from uni.

The big question is track running. It is December now and i am quite behind in my track fitness, but the positive is there is still 3 months until the states which leaves time to get my fitness back up. I have registered for the season which is a sign i am not done with my running yet! can i reach my goals i have tried to for so many years? can i not only qualify for the national champs but actually be good enough to compete in them?? that is my dream, just nationals that is all i want. Next year they are in Melbourne on the 15th-17th of April. Yes i have qualified for the 1500m but only through winning a bronze medal i didn't actually make the qualifying time. So i have been thinking... since it is late season and i have a much greater aerobic capacity than other years at this time of year, maybe i should try for the longer distances such as the 1500m or 3km or even the 5km. Last season my best 1500m time was 4.47.45 minutes on the 14th of January, from there i went downhill a little with an injury to 4.53.54 in March for the state finals. My goal is to break 4.40 minutes. My best 800m time was 2.19.64 minutes on Feb 18th, i would love to break my 2.28.4 minutes 800m record for when i was 17 but that can wait :) I'm not sure how i would go in a 3000m or 5000m race but i imagine i would have to aim to be around 10.30 minutes or 19 minutes for the 5km. My best 5km time has been 19.14 minutes at a Bunbury fun run, i think i could break that now i would love to try!! So i will make myself a 5km and 3km time trial in Bunbury and work on my 1500m times.

On Sunday i did my first track training session since March this year, i was so scared to see how much fitness and speed i had lost but thankfully it wasn't too bad!! For a trial i did a session where i start at 300m runs and decrease 20m each repetition until i am down to 100m and have about 2 minutes walk back recovery. My times were:

300m - 53 sec

280m - 50.3 sec

260m - 46.9 sec

240m - 43.9 sec

220m - 38 sec

200m - 34.6 sec

180m - 31.6sec

160m - 27.4 sec

140m - 22.4 sec

120m - 18.9 sec

100m - 14.9 sec

They were about 1-2 seconds slower than past runs up to around the 180m run then they were about the same if not slightly quicker due to a tail wind! It was awesome to put the spikes on again (they are now 7 years old though almost time for some new ones i think!!) To break the 4.40min (280 seconds) 1500m mark i need to keep up 18.6 seconds per 100m which is 56sec 300m runs or 1.14min 400m runs which doesn't sound too bad looking at the first track run times! but the longer you keep up a faster pace the harder it is to hold it. I can do it i know i can! The past few days since the track session have been:

Monday - (slightly sore from the sprints) 40 minute bike session (20km) and a pump class/weights

Tuesday - (even sorer from doing a pump class while sore!) 35 minutes interval bike session i.e. 30 min high resistance sprint and 1 min low resistance recovery x 20. then 7.5km run in 30 minutes.

Wednesday (today) - active recovery of a slower 50 min bike ride and 35 minute walk.

I'll give a track session another go tomorrow and try some 400m runs and maybe some 150's, i'm not expecting anything great but it should be interesting! I am feeling some degree of being fit all the same, I am excited to have new goals in sight and be free from uni to get back up to speed and next year i will not be neglecting my running once uni starts! I have learnt so much this past year and one of them is how much i love running and my fitness, something i do not want to neglect or put to the side as i did this year with uni and work. And what else have i discovered? i am not yet ready to give up my goals and dreams for track running yet no matter how small or large they are and i am excited at taking a slightly different approach by trying a longer distance :) But as a side note i know i will always keep going with running in how ever form it may take and have something to add to my bucket list in the future - to complete the Busselton ironman! but that will come in the next few decades... first things first track session tomorrow!! :)

Bring it on :)

Well it has been a rocky week. I have had a virus which has left me feeling exhausted! Which means the last long run i did was last Sunday about 9-10km around kings park with a run up Jacobs ladder. I was exhausted though and had to walk a little because of the virus. I just hope i have enough energy for tomorrow... that's right the city to surf is tomorrow!! I managed one short run throughout the week for the inter-college cross country in kings park. It was only 3.8km and i did it in 16minutes and was actually a little sore afterwards. But it was good to have one short run at least. I just have y fingers crossed i haven't lost too much fitness over the past week! But i am very excited for tomorrow. I'm going to try and beat last years time of 54 minutes given the circumstances, and if i get close to breaking 50 minutes like my goal, well that would be a big bonus :)

So the plan for tomorrow, first get a good sleep, breakfast before 7am, leave 7.30am and catch the train with a few others into the city, warm up and prepare and go!! The start i find is usually cruisey and a slower pace which is ok to save energy for the latter hills but i will try go a little faster at the start than previous years (even stopping to take a few photos) but no doubt i will pause at the top of kings park hill to see the sea of thousands of heads down the road! i love it :) To break 50 minutes i need to run around 4 minutes per kilometer at 14.4km/hr. But because of the hills i will pace myself so i know i am exerting myself but conserving my energy for the hills and taking advantage of the faster pace and gravity down the hills. I will balance it. If i get tired i will sing songs which inspire me in my head to keep going, but above all i will enjoy the atmosphere and the people and the day itself :) best head off to bed wish me luck!!

1 week to go :)

Time is sure going fast but at the moment i like it going fast as a way to 'rip the bandaid' off a few things i wouldn't mind being out of the way. Only one more week to go until the city to surf! I have had a busy past week and i think i am paying for it slightly now with a cold. Fingers crossed it will be gone by next week, it is probably a good thing to force myself to have a little break!

Last Friday was a 40 minutes run with some others around Matilda Bay which was quite nice. Saturday i did something different and took myself to a pump class at the gym, it had been way too long! While it felt great to get back into the weights i was sore Sunday and Monday but it was totally worth it :)

Sunday was a good long run through kings park and to Jacobs ladder where i ran up twice with 2 others. I need to do some more stair work as i found it quite hard! I suppose my legs being sore from the pump class did not help too much though.

Monday was a gym session where i went on the bikes for 45 minutes but too it slower than usual to help ease my legs back and get rid of some soreness.

Tuesday was a lot of fun as i went to my first spin class at the UWA gym! It is a great 45 minute workout on the bikes in a group session where you change resistance to mimic going up hills and sure works your legs! i'll be going back for more i am sure, then i had a 10 minute run afterwards to loosen up.

Wednesday was a 35 minute run around Zamia cafe in Kings park with the group and i did 10 minutes on the bike in the gym afterwards to add a little extra.

Thursday i went for a good km run along Matilda Bay which felt good even with a cold! it was such a beautiful afternoon. It took me around 40 minutes so it wasn't a fast pace but still felt good.

Friday/yesterday i had to force myself to not do anything but a nice walk outside as my cold has gotten worse. I wasn't feeling up to anything hard so i enjoyed the walk in the sun. I don't think i will be doing too much today either depending on how much i can breathe through a blocked nose but knowing me i will give it a try :)

No more running solo!

Hurray i am running with others!! It is so good to run in a group, you go faster, don't feel as tired and the time passes all too quickly while running. We had our first run Monday morning at 7am, the sun has only just come up which makes it lovely :) Our first run was a simple one along Mounts Bay road, i went to Narrows bridge which is about 6km there and back and had a fast finish which felt invigorating to catch some guys in front of me.

Tuesday I took myself to the gym and did a 35 minute bike session with 20 minutes of 30 second sprints on a higher level each minute. Followed by a few arm weights and ab work.

Wednesday was another early morning run with the group and we went up Kings park to the DNA tower. Again it was beautiful looking over the city with the early sun :) Myself and another guy ran up the tower 5 times before we all ran back for another 5/6km run. They are not as long as i do by myself but still good to get my fitness up :)

Today i went to the gym bikes and did a 50 minute session, 30km with 35 minutes of 30 second sprints on a harder level with a minute slower/recovery followed by some ab work. I like the bikes as an alternative to running, i will not get an overuse injury this time!

I'm looking forward to having more runs with the Trinity group, especially afternoon ones to get some more people involved and hopefully what looks to be a city to surf group also! 2 and a half weeks to go!

1 week and going strong

I have almost gotten through my first week back into everything minus 2 more lectures/seminars this fine Friday afternoon. I may feel it tonight after an early fire drill this morning! It always makes me feel like a buff body guard with my big RA jumper on and yellow fire hat but i am far from it haha. I am so happy my fitness is improving!! slowly but surely and i am not as sore after runs now. I have been to the gym everyday this week but am giving myself today off which ties in well being a busy day. So my training throughout the week has been:

Saturday - Gym session: 45 minutes on the treadmil with a total of 9km running. 5 minutes cool down on the bike and some sit ups and arm weights.

Sunday - Gym session: 45 minutes on the bike with 15 lots of 30 second sprints on a harder level and 1 minute active recovery between each sprint. Followed by sit ups and some arm weights.

Monday - Gym session; 10km run on the treadmil in 50 minutes (some walking at the start to warm up) this was a good session to see what a comfortable pace was for me over longer distance. I need to go a little faster to break 50 minutes for the 12km!

Tuesday - Gym session; 45 minutes on the bike with 20 lots of 30 seconds sprints on a harder level with 1 minute slower (active recovery) between sprints. The aim of this is to increase my anaerobic capacity which will be good when tackling the hills in the city to surf run! Good for when it is raining outside as an alternative to actually running up hills.

Wednesday - Gym session; 6km run on the treadmil about 30 minutes, then 10 minutes on the bike and some sit ups/arm weights

Thursday - Run to Narrows bridge (3km) i felt alive and so good! it was quite a fast pace. Then i found Kokoda stairs up to Kings park and ran up them 4 times... it was so hard i had to have a 10 second break half way up! i will be back there some more i know that! then i did 70 situps at the top and had a 15 minute run back to Trinity, it was just over an hour in total, was hard but felt good :)

Today - Rest :)

I have started a running group at Trinity which will hopefully start on Monday. I hope it goes well! It will be extra motivation for everyone :)

Back in Perth

Well i am back and have moved into college at UWA once again ready for semester 2 of year 3 med! It was a good last 2 days as we had a quiz night and formal dinner to get to know the new residents from all over the world. We also went go karting with the RAs as we hadn't seen each other for a while so that was great to start off our work together again this semester.

The past few days have not been hard in terms of running training. The day i moved to Perth i did 35 minutes on the cross trainer with 20x 10sec sprints with 50 seconds rest then 10 minutes on the rowing machine. I have had a problem with bad headaches possibly due to fighting some bugs which are going around but fingers crossed i wont get sick! The day before i took it slow and went for 2 45 minute walks and did 30 minutes of yoga. Yesterday i took on the weather and went for a run along Matilda Bay but it was divided into 2x 20minute runs as i got stuck under a tree with a heavy shower of rain half way! it was nice and refreshing though :) And today i had the whole trinity gym to myself as the other 300 residents move back into college this weekend. I managed a 10km workout - 9km in about 45 minutes running and the last 1km walking. I had the incline on 1 as apparently this makes the treadmill harder and is more consistent with the extra effort needed to run outside with a slight wind resistance. This week i hope to do some more hills and interval work, i will be making a weeks plan hopefully this afternoon to fit into the semester timetable!

It is always interesting talking to new people, i was chatting to one new resident last night who says he cannot do anything else apart from his study during the semester. That is his soul focus. I could not stand that, it is unhealthy! I told him i admire his determination and passion to do the course he loves and get to his goals in the future, but my thoughts were else where. What about the saying 'you must work to live not live to work'? It is true if you love your job enough and it is something you are passionate about then to can live through your work, but i am a strong believer in living a balanced life. What if you go through a hard stage and your uni marks fall? If you dedicate all your worth and time into those marks you will be hit hard. However, if you had another hobbie, sport or interest you found time for on the side, you have the other part of you to pick yourself up again as no one's life should be based on one single aspect! Release your frustration safely, talk to friends, go for a run, play some music, however you like and realise that tough parts in life can be overcome especially when you find other parts of life to keep you moving through the hard times. It does make me wonder how i manage to balance all that i do with my running, medicine and community and environment work, but they are all aspects of life i am passionate about and keep my life balanced. It can get hard, i learn so much along the way, but it is an experience i do not regret living. So no matter how hard this semester may get, i swear to make the most of all that comes my way in ALL aspects of my life and take each difficult in my stride and enjoy small successes along the way. I will put all that i have into everything i do.

Easing into the hills

It was a lovely morning - the still before the storm for tomorrow! - so i set out for a run to the beach which was just over 4km, then ran up our Marlston hill 4 times with walk down recovery, then a slow 4km jog home. It was actually quite warm and i felt it on the way back with a headache! So it was lots of water and some protein shake for me after wards, a new vanilla flavour which is nicer than the banana i had before. I had 2 35 minute walks this afternoon so feel a little tired at the moment! but with wet weather tomorrow it was good to have lots of time outdoors.

My heel is aching a little reminding me of the overuse injury over the past 6 months - plantar fascitis which i have only just gotten free of mainly due to rolling my ankle and not running, some proof that everything must happen for a reason whether good or bad. So the reminder of me to watch out for it to reoccur is lingering in the back of my mind. Better keep off the running tomorrow.

In the meantime i have bought the Cadel Evans biography. He is such as inspiration winning the Tour De France after all he has been through! I can't wait to read it, i have certainly caught the 'Cadel fever' :)

Taking a Jump

Yesterday marked only 5 weeks until the Perth city to surf. So, anticipating the big event i set about on a 'casual challenge' to run to Dalyellup - measured to be about 11.5km. Being my 6th day back running i didn't know what to expect and set out with my ipod at a nice pace. It was a beautiful evening, cloudy, no wind and i ran through town and along the beach, then through the Tuart Forrest before arriving to Dalyellup where i met mum and dad walking the dogs with the car. I couldn't have run too much further but managed 58 minutes at a comfortable pace! Yay i do have some fitness left!! My legs were still a little sore in the quads from the week so it was a really good run considering. So my goal of a sub 50 minute 12km run next month is in my reach!! There are 3 things i need to consider...

1. Running up the Perth hills - they might not look much but they still hurt!!

2. Running 1km or so more

3. Taking off at least 8 minutes

So i need to train on some hills, mostly interval training and try faster runs to keep up a faster pace. The good news is today i am not very sore! I feel a little weary but no major shin, foot or leg soreness which is great. Sometimes it comes on the 2nd day after though so we will see tomorrow. I have found though after i do longer runs i find it hard to sleep at night, whether it is because i still have adrenaline racing around my body hours after a long run is a good possibility, but it can get frustrating when your body is weary but your mind is racing, it is a feeling i am becoming accustomed to after these runs, i just need to find ways to deal with them.

Today was a 40 minute walk this morning with mum before the rain set in. Then a 40 minute session on the cross trainer with 20x10 second sprints. With only 2 more days until i head back to Perth and there is no telling how the time will pan out, i must just take it one day at a time and do training when ever i get the chance.

Learning to Fly again

As the days start to get busy again i know i will be writing less frequent in here but that does not mean my determination to reach my goals has diminished! Only 5 more days until i move back to Perth/college and start the next semester - semester 2 of year 3! I am determined to make it different from the last, better, and it will be.

When i was younger, i use to have these amazing dreams that i was flying. Not a very unique dream but it was the dream i loved to have. They felt so real! and they were good dreams. When i flew, i guess you could say i flew to be a sort of super hero, someone who only flew to save people from something bad, to pick them up off the ground and bring them away from their troubles. The dreams became less frequent as i became busier, but i always which for the dreams to come back as they really lifted me up spiritually and psychologically and made me believe that anything is possible. And what's more, that i was on the right path and by helping people i was doing more than lifting myself up in life but giving others the chance to fly also.

I would mostly channel the power the dreams gave me into running. To me running is the equivalent of flying, when you run you feel like you fly as your feet barely touch the ground and you go as fast as you can with the wind flowing past your body. It is bliss, it is my freedom. Now with my medical studies and community and environment work, flying has more than one meaning. But the freedom and exhilaration of flying when i run is the driver for my life and reflects my motivation for life whether the dreams are there or not.

Lately, the dreams have been coming back, but they are different. Instead of flying to help people and do good to others, I am flying to get away from something bad. Mostly I am being chased and scared. In the dreams there are points where I can’t fly and I become scared thinking ‘what has happened? Why can’t I do this anymore?’ But I am able to get off the ground just enough to be out of reach and out of harm’s way. On one occasion another person, a friend was involved and I could not pick them up like before so we had to resort to a car.

So what is this telling me? To me I am starting anew. I am running from the fear I have had and I am learning to fly again. I am bringing up my past power and am reminding myself of who I really am and how I truly want to be – strong, fighting and free. Soon I hope I will be able to fly fully again and not running away from my own troubles but again helping others with their own. I have never known my dreams to be such a real representative of my life. I never thought what the dreams of flying years ago would come back to help me realize what I need to do and how I need to change, both psychologically and physically, to have my strong mind and strong body back after a tough past 6 months. Thank you dreams.

So in terms of my running, the day off was much needed on Thursday and yesterday I went for a 30 minute (5-6km) run in the morning before we had the 7 hour drive back to Bunbury. Followed by a walk in the afternoon when we arrived home. Today was a 30 minute run (approx. 5-6km), 20 minute walk then 20 minutes on the cross trainer with 11x10sec sprints then some arm weights. I wont keep writing my meals as it is my guide for if i am getting 80/20 and a healthy diet. I can still cut back on the sweets a little and it will be better once i get back into a routine and not going everywhere over the holidays andmaking do with what i have.

I am so excited to have registered for the city to surf 12km on Thursday night! I put myself in the challenge and registered in ‘Wave 1A’ for the 48-62 minute category. Last year and the year before I was in C and weaved myself through everyone. I didn’t mind though as I would pick people in front as targets to reach and go faster, then once I got to them I would pick someone else. It will be interesting to be up closer to the front this year! On a good note, while i am a little sore still in the quads from running again, i feel like i am slowly getting fitness back! Well considering i have only been running for 5 days it must be coming back quickly so i better watch i am not over doing it and will stay away from overuse injuries! ... and honky nuts :P

p.s. i love new running shoes - asics nimbus gel = love. So much that i will show you a picture of my old and new pair! :)

3 runs in a row :)

Yesterday was my third run in 3 days and apart from loving the fact i am running again my legs are telling me to give them a break! I am a little sore in the quads, so no running for me today.

Am:

* 40 minute walk

Pm:

* 30 minute run (approx. 6km)

Meals:

Breakfast - muesli, yoghurt and honey

Lunch - tuna, apple and strawberry smoothie

Afternoon - lamington

Dinner - canapes from chopped vegetables to chicken and even smoked salmon on savoury pancakes! Then a green tea :)

Small success soon adds to bigger success :)

On a non-exercise related note, it was very exciting (although a little nerve wrecking) to finally get our first interview happening and completed in Geraldton after 6 months of waiting for approval! Small but sweet success, only 19 more to go (hopefully!). I was a little sore in the quads today after my run yesterday... it is not fair how much fitness you can lose in a few short weeks even with various cross training. But i lengthened yesterdays run out to a continuous 40 minutes with no stops which may have gotten to 8km at a cruisy pace but it is hard to judge. Still i will build my fitness up again! My ankle has pulled up a little stiff so i must watch that and try when ever i find myself simply standing to balance on one foot at a time to strengthen my ankles by holding my balance.

Pm:

* 40 minute run (approx. 7-8km) easy-mid pace and 20 minute walk

* 40 sit ups and 20 side crunches with a 3 minute plank

Meals:

Breakfast - apple and orange

Lunch - small kangaroo kebab, small piece of damper, tuna and piece of almond and custard scroll (at a fair)

Dinner - Roast capsicum stuffed with rice, mince meat, onion and garlic then a few strawberries and cherries + a green tea

Running again!

Myself and a fellow medical student friend were off to Geraldton today to continue our research project. So it was up early for some quick exercise before our 7.5 hour trip up North. Thnakfully we got there in good time to do some exercise before the sun went down and i tried my first run in 3 weeks! It felt so good :)

Am:

* 30 minutes cross trainer (18km)

Pm:

* 35 minute run (middle pace) and 25 minute walk

Meals:

Breakfast - muesli with milk and honey and green tea

Lunch - carrot, celery and rice crackers with peanut butter and a small banana

Afternoon - orange and green tea

Dinner - Wholemeal spaghetti and meatballs (yum :)) may have eaten bit too much though i was full! then a green tea

My feet held up with the run, i had a 5 minute stop half way to assess and stretch but so far so good :) my sores are weeping a little but not painful thank goodness! With no cross trainer or bike this week i better limit my running and not overdo it now that i feel comfortable enough to run again :)

6 weeks to go

Another beautiful day with the morning spent along the beach with the dogs, it almost felt like spring but it only the middle of winter! Was feeling a little tired from the 2 sessions yesterday i'd say.

Am:

* 1 hour walk

Pm:

* 35 min cross trainer - 18km (not putting down the levels as i swear they are not working!)

* weights - 50kg 3x15 chest presses, 3x15 back pulls and 40kg 3x10 knee extensions, 20 ab medicine ball passes

* 35 minute walk

Meals:

Breakfast - muesli with honey and milk and black tea

Lunch - carrot, celery and 2 rice crackers with avocado and sundried tomato

Afternoon - piece of sponge cake and a green tea and apple

Dinner - chicken and vege soup with home made white bread :)

Supper - green tea and half a piece of sponge cake

Gaining power from 'Floravit'

It was a beautiful day today, clear skies in the morning and little wind made it perfect for a bike ride along the back beach! I would love to get a road bike one day, one which i could take to Perth and ride along all the bike paths which go for miles :) But i do like my path in Bunbury around the inlet, through Marlston pass all the cafe's and along the beach. It is exercise but also relaxing and therapeutic looking over the beach.

Am:

* 1 hour bike ride

* Weights - 50kg 3x15 chest pushes, 3x15 back pulls and 40kg 3x10 knee extensions

* Abs - 30 sit-ups, 20 side crunches, 20 medicine ball passes with legs, 2 minute 20 sec plank

Pm:

* Cross trainer 45 minutes - 20km and 1000 calories averaging 27km/hr up to level 14

I'm not sure if the levels are working right, they don't feel different to me hence the large levels!! I need to have a look at the machine.

* 5 minutes on the rowing machine

Meals:

Breakfast - muesli with milk and honey and black tea

Lunch - Carrot, celery and chicken, cheese and avocado multi-grain sandwich

Afternoon - orange, red, green vanilla tea (from T2) and piece of dark chocolate

Dinner - Beef stew with vegetables and a piece of lemon sponge cake (my first ever sponge cake made by yours truly!!)

Supper - green tea

At lunch today i also started taking "Floravit", a liquid which has iron and B vitamins which i have heard lots about. My sister has taken the other liquid "Floradix" which has more herbs in it and was basically bouncing off the walls it was so good for her, she must have been deficient!. So i thought i would give it a go, it would especially be good for me over the semester in College due to the little red meat i eat and will assist my health and endurance for training. It is quite tasty too :)

6 weeks and 2 days to go

With only 43 days to go until the 2011 Perth city to surf and me barely walking right i am wondering how i will go to manage the 12km city to surf. But thinking about it, this time last year i was still in Europe on holiday sitting on buses, sight seeing and eating too much glorious food and in no shape to run a good 12km run, but only had 5 weeks training when we got back and managed to run 53 and a half minutes for the 12km! So considering i am trying and going for bike rides and cross training there is still hope :)

I have been looking at the city to surf 12 week training guides and i am a little behind in terms of fitness training on hills and doing intervals but feel i could do the majority of the training with 4-8km runs each day. I love quotes and motivational sayings, so i am going to write down the ones on the city to surf training guide to always have with me in order of their weeks...

Week 1: Obstacles are what you see when you take your eyes off the goal - anonymous

Week 2: If you want to win something, run 100 meters. If you want to experience something, run a marathon - Emily Zatopek

Week 3: Run the first part of a marathon with your head, the middle part with your personality, and the last part with your heart - Mike Fanelli

Week 4: Running is the greatest metaphor for life, because you get out of it what you put into it - Oprah Winfrey

Week 5: To win means nothing without the will to prepare - Juma Ikangaa

Week 6: Running is a big question mark that's there each and every day. It asks you, 'are you going to be a wimp or are you going to be strong today?' - Peter Maher

Week 7: Ask yourself, 'Can i give more?' and the answer is usually 'Yes' - Pail Tergat

Week 8: In running, it doesn't matter whether you come in first, in the middle of the pack, or last. You can say, 'I have finished.' There is a lot of satisfaction in that - Fred Lebow

Week 9: The miracle is not that i finished. The miracle is that i had the courage to start - John Bingham

Week 10: Don't bother just to be better than your contemporaries or predecessors. Try to be better than yourself. - William Faulkner

Week 11: You only ever grow as a human being if you're outside your comfort zone - Percy Cerutty

Week 12: There's no longer any room in your training plan for hard, fast or long runs. Forget them. If you run anything at or near race pace, don't run far. Strides can be enjoyed the day before a long race which are controlled sprints at a race pace but only by definition, short 150m at most. Soft surfaces are best and instead of jogging between strides, walk. In the race - apply everything you have practiced and don't throw away what you have worked for by going out too fast, listen to your body and stick to your training principles.

For me today, it was a rest day which also coincided with a mother and sister trip to Perth, so no training for me today.

Meals:

Breakfast - apple, orange and green tea

Lunch - Chicken, pumpkin, avocado and cous cous salad (from Sumo salad)

Afternoon - banana smoothie (made with real banana's from Pure and natural)

Dinner - carrot, pita and hummus, cheese and chives bread, chicken and a cupcake at a 21st party

Supper - green tea and piece of dark chocolate

Foot status - less painful and less hobble (yay!)

Just as a little calculation - in order to run 50 minutes for the 12km i need to run each kilometer in 4 minutes and 9 seconds. That is running at a pace of 14.5 kilometers an hour... hmm that will be a challenge! Last year rounding it to 54 minutes i would have been running about 13.5 kilometers an hour, that means if i was racing against my shadow i need to be almost a whole kilometer in front of myself last year... challenge accepted! Please heal quickly feet please!

Slow but steady steps

I had a trip to the doctors this morning to get these plantar warts on my feet looked at, how can something so small be so painful and annoying!! It got to a point where i could hardly walk let alone run, even the cross trainer impact is painful! But with a trip to the doctors i have taken one step backwards getting them treated but will soon be taking a leap forward :) Thankfully i can use bike pedals with my heels where there is no pain, so a bike ride again it was today!

Pm:

* 1 hour bike ride

* weights - 40kg 4x10 knee extensions, 3x15 chest press and 3x15 back pull, the 50kg 15x chest press then 40x sit-ups (abs a little sore today)

Meals:

Breakfast - muesli with milk and honey and a black tea

Morning - orange cake (made by yours truly with amazingly fresh picked oranges yum!)

Lunch - egg and avocado wholemeal wrap with chopped carrot and celery

Dinner - Dads special cooked salmon with vegetables and mashed potato (yum!) and an orange

Supper - green tea with dark chocolate (85% cocoa is really strong!)

Always an inspiration

My legs and butt are actually a little stiff today (yay!) which means i did some good work, so i went for a good bike ride along the beach today which was actually better for my sore on my foot not putting any pressure on the area. On the way i went past the runners club oval where i have trained in the past summer with other younger little athletics athletes and a great coach who is also a senior athlete.

This morning i saw a girl who is younger than me - just 16, but who is living a dream i would have loved to do. She is travelling to France for the world junior championships, representing Australia in the Under 18 400m hurdles. She is living proof though that if you work hard to get something and you are determined and motivated enough you can get it! Only last year she had shin and foot injuries and missed a season of athletics sticking to swimming and strength work before slowly introducing track running. Now she has been training over at the AIS in Canberra and competing over East and even New Zealand to get where she is now! She is a lovely and extraordinary girl though and deserves every minute of the experience and every success. I am not 16 anymore but that does not mean i cannot have my dreams, you never know what can happen in the future, all you have to do is try and give it your all, its the journey and not the destination. But no matter where the journey takes you, you will know you have given it your all and then you will not regret it. Take every opportunity you can and live every moment.

I spent the afternoon in Busselton with my mum and dad visiting my nan and pop, and following a lovely walk along the beach i saw the coach training younger athletes in Busselton. I would absolutely love to do my studies in Bunbury and keep training with them, i would give up all my extra duties in Perth as a college resident adviser and college life just to be in Bunbury, be with my family and train with them. I do have a coach in Perth i have been training with most of last year, but i did not enjoy it. The running of course i did! But the manner in which the training was done and mostly the group, some people were lovely but others weren't very welcoming. I do love my running enough to stay with them and suck it up but if it gets to a point where it makes the running itself not as enjoyable it is better off moving on and finding an alternative.

But the other issue is time. Time is a huge factor for me. If i thought it was last year that is nothing compared to this year. I have found it really hard to balance 3rd year medicine and the role i have taken on this year at my 3rd year of college - i am the community and environment advisor which means i help look after the 350 residents at college with 15 other RAs but my role is more focused on organising and running events such as lunches with disabled adults, cooking dinners for families who's children are at hospital, pancake day for uniting care west, The Worlds Greatest shave for the leukaemia foundation, Australia's biggest morning tea for cancer council, we raised money for Japan making origami, planting trees along cottesloe... i absolutely love the principle and being involved in it all, i am a believer in volunteering and caring for our community and environment as we can learn and experience so much from lending a helping hand and doing our part for the community which can cannot learn any other way. Except i have learnt i prefer to be more on the doing side and not the organising side. This year is a huge learning curve.

Not only that but thinking i had it all worked out, i chose my 3rd year elective to be a rural health research project based in Geraldton where myself and another close friend studying medicine with me are investigating Aboriginal women's experience of menopause. It seemed a great way to be more involved with Aboriginal people, experience rural places up north and better still there were no lectures or tutorials so work was done in our own time which we thought would be great to be so flexible with other duties and work... boy did we get that wrong.

In previous years that would have been the case, but this project up in Geraldton was a new one which we started in January and spent our first week in Geraldton writing ethics proposals and contacting women and health workers to see who would be interested and researching past research papers, creating so many documents for ethics assessments...... basically our simple elective as turned into a PHD type research project and it has put us under so much pressure! The project only got approved by ethics 2 weeks ago after 6 months and we are hoping to finally get some interviews for the research under way next week up in Geraldton and do some analysis before semester 2 starts up again. There may be some light at the end of this whirlwind research tunnel as we are looking at extending the project into 4th year to ease the burden and time constraints and put less pressure on the women and organisations in Geraldton.

So basically these past 6 months have been so frustrating for me, not only being busy but not having time to train and get to training sessions which the Perth coach or even keep myself resonably fit. But semester 2 is going to be different. I have learnt running and exercise is a part of me that i cannot live without no matter how little time i have. I must always make time for it. It is my therapy for any emotion - for joy and happiness to anger and frustration, running and exercise is my expression and in tough times it is how i keep the smile off my face.

These past 6 months got to a point where i did not feel myself and i absolutely hated it. They say medical students have a lot higher rate of depression due to the work load than other people our age. I am very strong minded and positive and always keep a smile on my face no matter what, but i have learnt how to break my limits this time and i was worried about myself. No matter i made it and last week in Kalbarri with the family was a break i needed along with some time home to sort myself out again. Mistakes are opportunities for growth and while i know taking on this much was a mistake, i would have regreted it if i didn't.

In Kalbarri we went to a restaurant which had a saying that said 'if you might more than you can chew, chew harder!' I can survive these next 6 months, it will get hard but i have learnt for the past 6 months and to get through the next i know what to change to adapt better and make it through. Unfortunately this year has proven to be a bad recipe for a relationship which has been really hard, i blame myself but i did take on all this before i had a boyfriend. There is no telling what happens in the future but you must take what comes your way and do your best with it. Anyway i am hoping that by continuously letting it out verbally as well as in exercise i will be able to move on and deal with things better and bring back my positive self again :) which i will!

Soooo with a mending rolled ankle and painful sore on my foot preventing me from running and much exercise (this is just not my year is it??) I did what i could for day 3:

Am:

* 45 minute bike ride

* Ab work - 20 crunches, 20 side crunches, 20 leg crunches, 20 toe crunches, 10 paused push ups, 1 minute static fly, 2 minute plank

Pm: 1 hour walk

Meals:

Breakfast - muesli with yoghurt, banana and honey

Lunch - Quinoa and vege's with a little red meat

Afternoon - Green tea, scone plus lemon cake (you can't resist nanna's cooking!)

Dinner - sweet chilli chicken and salad wrap

Supper - black tea and scone

I may have slightly over done the 20% indulgence but i only visit my nan and pop once every few months so it was worth it ;)

Assessing Day 2

Well there was no soreness from the few weights i did yesterday or the rowing machine which surprised me a little. Sooooo this means i can and need to be doing heavier weights and more reps. Today i had another session on the cross trainer (i can't wait until my battered feet are better and i can put more impact on them and run again!!) and did a few weights:

Am:

* 30 minutes cross trainer, up to level 13 and 10x10-15sec sprints every minute for 10 min. I kept up a fairly constant 29km/hr (650 calories and 13.5km)

* Weights - 3x15 chest presses, 3x15 back pulls and 4x10 knee extensions all on 40kg again

* 10 minutes on the rowing machine level 2

* 5 minute cross trainer cool down

I tackled my abs after and did a trial of 20 crunches, 20 side crunches, 10 push ups on feet holding for a few seconds upon lowering, 20 toe crunches, 20 lower ab/leg crunches, a flying static hold for a minute and a plank for 2 minutes.

The plank was precisely 2 minutes and 20 seconds to the some 'Defining Gravity' which i thought was a good theme!

Pm: 45 minutes walk

Meals:

Breakfast - muesli with milk and honey and a green tea

Morning snack - 3/4 scoop protein powder

Lunch - chicken Caesar salad

Afternoon - apple and orange

Dinner - Stir-fry and a handful of nuts and dates

Supper - green tea and piece of dark chocolate

My official weigh in was 53.4kg - I am still ina healthy weight range for my height and while i would like to lose some body fat mass my aim is to swap it for muscle mass and tone up to become leaner as well as fitter! No weights for tomorrow though, it hasn't been strenuous but rest is still vitally important! I must buy some more protein powder too :)

My New Beginning

And so my next round of goals begins again, but this time with a different focus. I am passionate about my running and have competed in athletics for 14 years since i was 7. I have moved from sprints and hurdles to 800 and 1500m runs and have gradually started longer distances. Being winter and not the athletics track season most of us move to cross country and longer distances. After a hectic semester of university and college duties i would say i was forced to withdraw from my running (but never exercise in general!) only realise that it is my running and my goals which keep me going. Exercise and fitness is my second life with medicine, the two go hand in hand with determining health. I can channel any and every emotion into exercise, it is my release, my meditation, my support, my passion and my freedom. So no matter how busy i become, i will always incorporate my training as my fitness is a large determinant of my health and well being both physically and mentally which cannot be replaced.

Now i have a new incentive and added focus to increase my fitness and potential - strength! I will strive to build my muscle mass especially in my upper body with my small frame -155cm tall and 53kg in weight.

Today was my first day back from a family holiday in Kalbarri and marks the beginning of working towards my next set of goals - to break 50 minutes in the 12km Perth city to surf fun run in August, and to increase my upper bodt muscle mass and tone up my lower body. I must be careful as i still have a bruised and swollen ankle which i rolled 2 weeks ago and having not run for the 2 weeks need to build both my running and weights up slowly.

I am keeping myself going with inspirational sayings, quotes or songs i find for inspiration when needed. But to start off with my song/theme will be 'Release me' - a song by Agnes Carlsson

So today i trialled:

Am:

* 25 minutes on the cross trainer - average 30km/hr on level 13 (550 calories and 12km) there were 8 sets of 10-15sec sprints per minute in there at the end.

* 40kg weights machine - 3x15 chest presses, 3x15 back pulls and 4x10 knee extensions

* 10 minutes on a rower machine - level 2 at 28 rows per minute

* 5 minutes cross trainer cool down

Pm:

* 1 hour 15min flat walk

Meals:

Breakfast - museli and honey with english tea

Morning - chai latte and shared chocolate cake (my '20' for the day)

lunch - small quinoa, tuna and salad mix

Afternoon - apple + orange

Dinner - Spaghetti bolognaise and natural yoghurt with 1/3 scoop 'define' protein powder

Supper - green tea and 1 piece dark chocolate

The meals were quite standard for me, although i do not go out for morning tea every day. I'll see how i am feeling tomorrow, if there is no soreness or stiffness..... i will 'release myself' more and up the sessions until i feel it enough to need a rest day!! No pain no gain :)